To think that we could stay the same
by Leviathian
Summary: Leon has a lot of new free time on his hands, now that he's lost his Champion title and Rose being in jail. A lot of new free time to recognize that, maybe, just maybe, he should pay a little more attention to why his chest hurts when he looks at Raihan.


If he was going to be honest, Leon was at a loss. It hadn't even been a week since the Championship tournament. Just a couple days. A handful. Near all of which he spent cooped up in his apartment, because no matter who could try to ask Leon had no idea where to go from there.

He hadn't _not_ been busy, of course– Galar could never slow down enough to allow him a break from paltry, shallow interviews and big speeches. The press loved him. It had been both relieving and frustrating to know that his loss hadn't meant the change of that. That one defeat didn't mean everything Leon knew had suddenly just– vanished.

Losing had been... a lot. Ten years, and he was overwhelmed from a single loss. It only took one to dethrone him. While Leon was glad that out of anyone, it was Gloria who became champion, he was still… still…

It took Leon a couple of days to get the courage to leave his apartment once he escaped the press (once they all became preoccupied with their shiny new champion, and wow, how _pathetic_ was he, hiding here instead of helping Gloria to field a crowd set to devour her whole, had he learned nothing–?). What else was he supposed to do? Crying didn't fit right (though he had done it anyway), celebrating didn't feel right (though he had done _that_ anyway)– All he had done was visit his family, and Sonia, and Raihan and–

Well, he couldn't skip around and mope forever. His title being gone didn't mean his responsibilities were.

_Gloria is 11, for Arceus' sake._

First things first. Small steps. Small enough that he could hold them easily in his hands. (Small enough to not panic. A breakdown wasn't useful to anyone.)

What was small anymore. What could he _handle?_ There were his priorities, of course... cleaning up after Rose. There was a lot to clean up. So much _damage…_

That was too big. Just the idea of it was enough to shorten his breath.

Okay, he could work on fixing up Hammerlocke?

...He had already tried that. Raihan had all but kicked him out— Leon wasn't sure whether Raihan had been telling the truth or not when he told him that Leon wasn't responsible for Rose nor the mess made of his gym, but he had been booted nonetheless. It was out of his hands.

Dealing with the dynamaxed Pokémon. _That_ he could handle. Leon could do that. Battling was as easy as breathing— oh wait, Hop, Gloria and her twin Victor took care of it. It had been dealt with while he was still unconscious and in the hospital, because Eternatus had taken him out without him being able to do a thing– not to protect Galar, not to protect _Hop_–

What was left to do, that he _could_ do?

(What was still in his control. What had _ever_ been in his control—)

Leon got himself a Rotom smartphone. Ditched his cape, got some new clothes. Or well... just stopped wearing his uniform. It was beyond weird, feeling anything but his usual leggings or tight top.

(The hat stayed. He had plenty of them, but he— maybe just this one thing could stay the same. He could have that. He could _choose.)_

New clothes, a new phone._ His._ More free time. No one was able to hound him about a schedule. Rose was in jail, Oleana was in jail— who was left to lord over Leon but himself?

(Weird. _Strange_. Who was he _supposed_ to check with now, when Raihan asked him if he was free, when Hop begged him to come home for breakfast, when Sonia asked for a hand in the lab he was _sure_ she didn't even need but kept accepting anyways just because he _could_, now—)

Leon started by asking his PR team to leave.

Sort of. He was vaguely sure he just fired them. The exact words never left his mouth, but by the end of the day they were packed up and gone and Leon was left scrolling through a social media page that wore his name and his face but that he had never seen before. Millions of people followed it. Pictures of himself, framed in the bright stadium lights of battle arenas and professional camera sets. His famous pose, his famous smile.

It was _his_ now, and Leon had no idea what to do with it.

Rotom phones were a pretty recent thing, for all that they had exploded throughout Galar. Leon couldn't remember growing up with a smartphone just on hand. He couldn't remember Raihan having one either, though his friend was constantly on one now— surely if it had been a thing back before Leon was champion Raihan would have had one, wouldn't he have? By the time they were a thing, Leon couldn't allow himself to have one because Rose took care of it.

Why bother? It was a _waste of time,_ just like everything else was...

("You have your image to look after now," Rose had told him. Had pulled him away from the stage lights and celebrations. Left just him and Leon— and Oleana, of course, stood statuesque at the door as if she was blocking him from leaving through it. But where else could he go? "I'll have a PR team manage it. You won't even have to do a thing."

"Just focus on battling. I'll take care of it all. All you have to do is smile for the cameras," and Rose had smiled, and Leon had nodded and said okay and not run out like he wanted to.)

Rose and Oleana both were gone. Leon was his own boss. No one was left to yell at him (even if he was waiting for it, was almost hoping for it, because at least then he would have a direction pointed out for him to start moving forward again). It was just him. He, himself, and his new Rotomphone.

...Which was chirping at him. Leon smiled down at it and finally continued to scroll, watching as it returned to content quiet. How long had he just been sitting there staring at an unrecognizable Pokegram profile?

Back to priorities. What Leon could take care of, in the moment, narrowed down to what was physically in arms reach. His appearance, and his phone. He finally owned an actual social media. Whatever this was, unfamiliar and distant from him, hadn't counted. Not really– not if he was never in control of it in the first place. This was his first time using social media. Leon only vaguely knew how Pokesnap or Pidgeottor were supposed to work, but there was no time like the present.

...and there he was again, back at a loss. What in Arceus' name did anyone actually do with social media? Sure, the other gym leaders all had theirs, but Leon was pretty sure they were run by PR teams as well. Except for Raihan's. Leon wasn't so blind to miss how his friend was constantly on his phone. It was pretty hard to not notice considering he was always posting selfies, live-streaming battles— and that a good number of them included Leon himself. Raihan was the only one of them that actively cared about his online presence beyond as an advertisement, it seemed...

Leon blinked and fumbled for his phone. "What can I help you with?" It jumped as Rotom chirped, shaking out of Leon's frozen hands. "I am able to search for anything you might be looking for if you can provide me with a name~?"

_Right_. Rotom phone. A whole Pokémon he could just ask— Leon pat uselessly at his cheeks, feeling them burn with embarrassment. "A-Ah, right, uh—" the Rotom swayed in front of him, patiently humming. Leon doubted he could fluster any more than he already was. "My uh— can you— do you know what Raihan's Pokésnap account is...?"

"Of course! Your account has been following his since they were both made available, approximately ten years ago. He is available here~!"

Leon watched as Rotom seamlessly switched windows, screen moving dizzyingly through images before settling on a profile paneled with Raihan's unmistakable face. "Um— thank you!" His face was way too hot. He could, apparently, get more embarrassed.

What kind of rival was he? Arceus, what kind of _friend_ was he, to not even know Raihan's account! Especially with how much emphasis it so clearly held on his friend's life— Leon could distinctly remember the context behind a lot of the photos posted. The background of the most recent post was from the last time all of the gym leaders had gone out for dinner, before the final Championship battles (he hadn't been able to make it, Rose had asked him to come up to the tower to _talk_– He wasn't going to even try to think about how Raihan hadn't been posting for days since. Not since Rose had– not since they were both– it was the longest break Raihan had between posts since making the account.) The one before that was in a sand storm mid-battle with Gloria (he had barely caught that match himself, forced to chase after loose ends and sponsorships), the selfies with his Pokémon, at a meal, working out, when he lost against Leon—

Leon scrolled, and scrolled, and scrolled.

It felt like Raihan's entire life had been carefully plastered onto the screen, and yet Leon barely recognized so many of them. It was almost the same smile every time. Fang-toothed and cocky, playful yet dangerous for all its friendliness. Perfectly confident.

Leon stared. Raihan really did make that expression a lot, didn't he.

Everything was _staged_. It wasn't _false_, persay — Raihan was as casually genuine as Leon was excitedly genuine. He wasn't the type to bother the effort of lying. Especially not in something like maintaining a social media account. It was just— just staged. Like a ritual, he smiled the same way in every photo. Clothing unruffled, posture nonchalant. Not a hair out of place.

Not that that was necessarily a bad thing. Leon wasn't sure Raihan _could_ make a bad photo— even with the same pose, the same pull to his smirk, the same sharp eyes and heated snarl and excited victory or defeat, Raihan was still as handsome as ever. Leon couldn't possibly be tired of it. It didn't matter how many times Raihan smiled for the camera, not with how often it still made his chest _tighten_—

The Rotom flicked up and out of Leon's hands before he could impulsively fling it off the bed.

"Wait!" He gasped. Clumsily, he reached for the phone and breathed a sigh of (only mildly surprised) relief when Rotom obediently slipped back into his hand. "T-thank you. I didn't mean to throw you, I just— I'm adjusting. It won't happen again." The device blinked up at him, chirping blithely in response. It hadn't even shifted away from Raihan's pokegram account. Still mid scroll through one of his more recent selfies, hair tied back and headband switched out for something more meant for a workout. Sweat ran down his bare shoulders.

It always shook Leon a little, to see his rival without his signature hoodie. Being taller than Leon didn't mean the man actually filled out the baggy top, and every glimpse of tight, lean muscle underneath was—

It was just a little surprising. Nothing else, nothing like— Leon slapped at his cheeks, shaking his head roughly. Being so distractible was really doing a number on him today. He needed to get a hold on himself.

So what if Raihan staged his photos. That was well within his right. He wasn't being forced (like Leon was), wasn't being shoved under the makeup brushes and mirrors and cameras (like Leon had been)—

_It's just kind of— a shame,_ Leon supposed, tracing the sharp slope of Raihan's jaw. The curve of his lips, the arch of his brow— _Raihan is so handsome when he doesn't even try. He's pretty all the time, but even _more_ so when–_

Leon quickly stopped thinking about it. His entire face burned so hotly he had to fight the urge to reach up as if to pat out a fire. What in Arceus' name– Raihan wasn't– he wouldn't appreciate Leon calling him _cute_ of all things. That clearly wasn't the image that the other man was going for. _How embarrassing…_

Leon hesitantly looked back up at Raihan's Pokegram profile. The pictures were unchanging. Beautiful, perfect– but stagnant. Framed and executed with repetitive purpose. As if Raihan had carefully chosen a single attribute of his personality and molded that into his sole image.

...It wasn't really a problem, was it? Leon had to be overthinking it. So what if Raihan wanted to keep up a persona online? It wasn't as if that extended to real-life; Leon could confirm Raihan had plenty more expressions than the same casually feral grin he used in battle or posed with fans for. Regardless he looked… good. Really good.

Raihan _always_ looked good.

Heat burned up to his ears. Leon fought not to try to shake it off violently.

It wasn't as if his opinion was _controversial_. Lots of people thought Raihan looked good. Just being more active didn't make a popular social media, but Raihan held the most online traffic on every account compared to the rest of the League. Raihan knew he was attractive. He showed it off, flaunted it easily. Post workout selfies, battle selfies, group photos from the varied League get-togethers they had–

Leon slowly skimmed back up through the gallery before him. Rotom had patiently not said a thing about it but Leon was more than aware that he had _definitely_ paused for longer than was normal staring at his screen.

Raihan was objectively attractive. Leon wasn't as oblivious as most people assumed– although he did admittedly take longer to catch onto some things. Most things. But these photos were– they left something to be desired. Something missing, leaving Leon wanting and he could only vaguely guess _why._

...No matter how he looked at them, they were too staged. Raihan's social media didn't match up to the more complex image the dragon trainer held in Leon's head. They lacked depth. Variety. Where were the expressions Leon knew? The ones Raihan gave to newborn baby dragon pokemon and the sunrise, the ones he made when he thought Leon wasn't looking, when he caught the other staring down into his half-empty drink late at night, when he collapsed drunk in Leon's arms in the rare nights Rose had allowed him to join them?

None of that was here. All of Leon's own memories felt displaced, faced against the shallow composure on the screen.

It was all the same: a perfect and posed persona– and Leon couldn't shake how confusingly _disappointed_ that made him feel.

A familiar determination sparked to a roar in him. Bullied through the cracks and cold left from losing his title. Floundering, feeling lost– it all eclipsed in the raw excitement of _Something To Do._

Rotom jerked back as Leon shot to his feet, blankets flying off him from the force of the movement to crumple forgotten around his feet. "Rotom," He started. The excitement was near enough to make him tremble. He had almost forgotten the feeling– almost forgot what it was like, to anticipate something so thoroughly he shook. It only made it stranger to not feel the pitch of the stadium under his feet, the roaring of a crowd– "Will you help me out?"

Finally, something to do. Something he could do, Something small and manageable and harmless and fun–

"Of course Leon! With what?"

Leon opened his mouth and– paused. Wasn't it… illegal, to take pictures of someone without their consent? Or at least just really creepy? Raihan was openly vain, not to mention his rival– his best friend, if he was being honest– but Leon kind of doubted even he would just brush it off if he found out Leon was essentially about to start a private smear campaign against Raihan's cultivated image…

...Then again. Who was going to see it but himself?

"I…" Leon steeled himself. The smile came practiced and easy. It slotted smoothly onto his face as if it had never left. Feeling it was comforting, a little. "Let's start a game, Rotom. Do you want to learn how to play?"

Rotom chirped excitedly.

* * *

"Leon?"

Leon jumped. The voice behind him shouldn't have been as surprising as it was, but— Rotom flew out of his pocket. He nearly flung himself to the floor spinning on his heels.

Raihan grinned as he turned. "Whatcha doing here mate? Usually, you text me a warning before...?" Leon wasn't sure what must have been on his face (panic, probably— the nerves of his own game had been building so much just from entering Hammerlocke stadium that he had stepped inside and _frozen_—) but whatever Raihan saw may him wave his hands placatingly. "Not complaining! You know I'm always happy to see you. But I do still want to know."

What was he doing in Hammerlocke? Leon wasn't the type to show up unannounced– Arceus knew he hated when Rose or Oleanna just decided to put something new on his roster.

...It wasn't as if he could be _honest_. Leon wasn't about to be as naive as to think he could just, what, show up and ask Raihan to start posing? That would defeat the whole purpose, not to mention–

_Not the _point_, Leon, get a hold of yourself!_

"Just... wanted to hang out, I guess," Leon finally managed. "If you aren't free, I can–"

"No, It's fine!" Raihan rushed out. "Dude, you don't actually need to have an excuse to come see me! And here I thought we were more than rivals– hurry up, get in before someone sees you." Leon froze when warm fingers wrapped around his bare wrist and tugged him further into Hammerlocke.

There was barely time to even blink before they were racing through empty hallways (and not so empty hallways, though by the way Hammerlocke's staff reacted Leon was more than aware how often Raihan ended up doing exactly this). He could never hope to find them himself, but Hammerlocke was full of little nooks and crannies to hide in. Stone hallways and rooms of tapestries. Locked doors and rooftop access; all of which Raihan owned the keys to.

The next thing he knew, they were sprinting through the elevator doors up to the top of the castle. Leon squinted, eyes struggling to adjust to the sudden light change.

Rotom, still hiding out from under his hair, poked out just enough to catch a glimpse of Raihan squeezing his eyes shut from the sun.

Leon watched it take a picture he knew would be full of teeth and sunlight and wondered how the hell he was going to keep this up without dying.

* * *

This was impossible.

"You're a hot mess."

Nessa snorted, nudging Sonia with her elbow without even looking up from her phone. "He's just a mess, thanks."

Leon groaned louder. It wasn't enough to make either of them stop laughing at him. Sonia looked more than ready to smack him for his troubles. Which wasn't fair at all, didn't he have enough to deal with already?

"I thought you wanted this," Sonia argued, "You do realize you can just stop whatever you're doing whenever you want, right? Who's gonna stop you?"

"Rose is in jail," Nessa helpfully provided. "What are you even doing, anyway?"

Leon hesitated. He knew they wouldn't press if he chose not to tell them. Nessa and Sonia both played at being too nosy for their own good but at the end of the day, Leon was more than aware that they had his back. He could count on them to tell him to stop if the game got out of hand, couldn't he? Sonia had never shirked at curbing him before when he did something stupid.

"I'm playing a game with Rotom," He started slowly. Said pokemon shot up off the bed at its name.

Both girls arched a perfect brow. Leon immediately regretted everything. "_That's_ why you're so mopey? Because you're hanging out with your new shiny smartphone?" Sonia asked incredulously. Nessa looked torn between continuing to laugh at him or kicking him off the bed with them. She didn't in the end, but Leon was sure it was less because she didn't want to and more because he was near positive that his hair had gotten tangled into hers laying down. He would take his blessings where he got them. "Leon, that's stupid."

Rotom hovered closer, screen flickering brightly onto Leon's lock screen. Leon did his absolute best not to flush when Sonia looked at it.

He absolutely proceeded to fail when Rotom happily unlocked directly into the last thing Leon had been using. Which was his photo gallery. Which was quickly becoming full of one thing and one thing only.

"Leon." Sonia's face was dead serious. Nessa, beside her, was shaking where she had curled in on herself, hiding her face from Leon's sight. From the tiny giggles that escaped her, Leon was pretty damn sure she wasn't shaking from being upset. "Leon, I take it back. _You're_ stupid."

Leon pressed both his palms into his eyes, groaning, and rolled off the bed.

* * *

Things were getting out of hand. By things Leon meant everything and anything and by _that_ he meant Raihan.

His gallery was filling up so much faster than he was prepared for. What in Arceus' name did Rotom think Leon needed hundreds of photos of Raihan for? This was supposed to last for a couple of photos. Like a solid... maybe 50. Was 50 pushing it?

_No,_ he decided, looking down at the 272 photos currently in his album, _50 is definitely not pushing it._

It seemed Rotom took their little game more seriously than even Leon himself. What felt like half the photos were just from nights spent unexpectedly drunk– both of them sprawled over Leon's couch, or on the floor, or even the rare photo draped over a bed– hair mussed, face flushed. One camping trip resulted in a whole handful of photos with Raihan snoring in the grass, dripping with slime from a cluster of wild Goomy's that decided to sleep on his stomach.

Photos from early, early mornings, when Leon woke up far before Raihan (a habit he was continuously failing to break, even a week after Rose had been arrested) and gotten a glimpse of sharp hip bones poking out from under twisted shorts, drool on Raihan's face and one leg somehow having made its way to the top of Leon's couch.

Raihan in the dim lighting of one of their apartments, face lit up from the warmth of Charizard's tail, or moonlight, or the mindless TV droning some stupid cheesy movie. Mid laugh, when Raihan caught their pokemon doing something stupid. Leon caught him when one of the many dragon eggs in the Lake of Outrage sanctuary hatched in his lap. He managed to sneak a shot of when Raihan tried Leon's curry and it wasn't terrible. A handful of pictures were just times Leon surprised him by showing up unannounced.

(Those pictures in particular always made his heart ache like a fresh bruise and for the life of him he didn't know _why_.)

(Raihan looked so _happy_ in those photos.)

Everything and anything and all the in-betweens. Especially the in-betweens. Leon loved them all so, so dearly.

...Far more than he expected himself to. Maybe he was due for another (admittedly very unhelpful) call to Sonia.

Or to his mother. that would actually have some results.

* * *

It was undeniably nice to be home. The idea of being able to spend hours just doing what Oleanna would call _"nothing at all",_ to just sit on the grassy fields in Postwick with Hop, was almost overwhelming.

To be able to come home at all– that Leon could just– that no one would be able to stand up and say _"No, you can't,"_ anymore. Rose abandoned that role the moment he decided to broadcast the Darkest Day nationwide.

Leon couldn't possibly thank him enough for it.

Being able to just drop everything and come home was a blessing. Granted, Leon didn't have much at the moment to drop (a lie, a blatant lie, there was so much to do and he didn't even know where to _start_–) but the sheer concept of being able to just go home essentially when he wanted was... a lot to take in. Leon honestly hadn't registered yet that Rose nor Oleanna was around the corner anymore to catch him sneaking out until Hop had begged him to come home.

It hadn't been hard to say yes. Leon loved his little flat up in Wyndon. He really did. But something in him ached a lot stronger at the idea of spending a night (or two, or three, or a whole week because _who was going to stop him)_ in his own old bedroom. Childhood walls, close and homey and warm as ever. Still somehow familiar. He was so happy how familiar it all was.

Even better was being able to just hang out with his family. It took a while to process it all, but...

(two days. Two whole days before he had gone stiff and silent. His mom had sat him down with tea over the loudest breakdown he had ever had and that was– was–– _nice_. He hadn't been so loud in a long time. Leon had thought he got all his hang-ups and tears out after he lost his title, back alone in his flat and surrounded by his team but... maybe he should have tried harder. Maybe he shouldn't have let it come to this, before he gained the confidence to come home...?

_No, no, no._ They had been over this. His parents had taken excessive care to outline that Leon had had very little control. If he had none over himself, how could he expect himself to have any over _Rose?)_

Leon jerked upright and smacked his cheeks lightly. The time for moping was over. He was supposed to be relaxing, reconnecting with his family, spending time with––

"You alright?" Hop asked quietly. Leon jumped. He immediately tried to cover the reaction up, shifting into a cheesy pose and a cheesier smile.

Hop frowned at him and Leon wilted a little. His little brother really had gone and grown up, hadn't he...?

_And you missed all of it._ Leon discreetly slipped his hands under his thighs before they could do so much as twitch upwards. He didn't have time to waste feeling sorry or having regrets. Hadn't he already spent enough time doing exactly that? "I'm okay," He finally responded. It was admittedly difficult to soften the act, but Hop deserved better than the artificial distance of lying. "I really am." Eventually, at least. It would get easier. The groundwork was all there, he just had to keep walking.

(It maybe stung and warmed in equal measure, that it was the quiet solemnity that made Hop smile at him again. They had both grown up a lot, in these past few months hadn't they...?)

Dubwool groaned up at them from where he was still practically burying Hop in his fluff.

Hop rolled his eyes, breaking eye contact to return to lavishing affection onto his pokemon. "Yeah, yeah, I got it, you're greedy," he grumbled. They fell back into silence. Leon sat back, content to just watch idly as Hop's small hands diligently rubbed down around his partner's horns. Something in Leon relaxed to be able to just watch his brother dote on his pokemon. Although, honestly, he felt indecipherably good watching Hop do just about anything. (Time with his brother always, always meant time off. Time not frantically running circles for Rose, time not being scolded by Oleana. He had missed enough of it with Hop.)

Rotom hummed against his leg and Leon's chin almost slipped right off where he propped it onto his hand. It was still slow-going, getting used to the pokemon. That and having a social media unabashedly his, that he could post whatever made him happy at the moment.

Leon paused and fumbled for his phone.

The camera opened up to Hop blinking up at the lens, brows high. "Are you– is this for your new Pokégram?" He asked. Leon wasn't entirely sure what to do with all that surprise in his little brother's voice. Nor what to do about Hop knowing about his Pokégram in general.

He lowered the phone after snapping a single photo. "...Aren't you too young to be on social media, still?" Hop's eyes weren't meeting his. Leon dropped the phone, letting Rotom buzz away to post the photo at its leisure while he busied himself with lunging for his sibling. "Hop! I don't have to talk to you about the dangers of strangers online, do I? Does mom know about this, are you–"

Hop smacked at his hands. It did nothing to deter Leon. "Hey-hey!" He wheezed. Leon was happy to hear laughter in his voice despite his (very halfhearted) glare. "I'm not– I'm not a _baby_, I can handle my own Pokégram! What are you, an old man?!"

_Now that's just uncalled for–_

Hop shrieked when Leon's knuckles found his hair, shoving him down into Dubwool's coat enough to muffle his yelled plea for mercy.

They went rolling down the hill, yelling, and Leon felt lighter than he had since that day on the pitch.

It took them a long, perfect moment to calm down. Leon loved them the most, when the laughter was just dying down and the peak smoothed into something like a still surface. It settled something in him every time. He was more than happy to lean back on his elbows and let Hop make off with his hat like a bandit with a prize.

Rotom chirped next to his arm. Leon barely paused in reaching for his phone, wanting to see whatever caption the pokemon decided to stick onto the image. The phone only buzzed out of reach as Hop landed half on Leon's stomach, forcing the air out of him as he stretched awkwardly to see the screen. Groaning dramatically didn't earn him more than an eye roll.

Hop leaned back when Rotom came closer again, eyes trained on the image of himself almost sucked up into the cloud that was Dubwool's fur. "Can I send this to myself?" He asked, fingers already flying to do exactly that, "I wanna send it to Victor– did you know that Gloria apparently just takes over all of their shared ac...counts..."

Leon blinked as Hop suddenly scrambled off him, Leon's phone firm in his hands.

"Lee," Hop started slowly. Leon frowned, sitting up straighter. The last time he had seen that look on his brother's face, Galar had been– Hop turned massive golden eyes on him, a smile stretching up and out in a grin decidedly_ shit-eating._ _"Lee."_

Hop turned his phone back to him. Leon was already frozen. He knew what was going to be there. An endless, complete wall of just–

"Lee, why didn't you tell me _you have a crush on Raihan?_ I thought you loved me!"

Hop backpedaled violently as Leon swiped for him. Leon couldn't even remember standing up but quickly decided that remembering was nowhere as important as _getting his phone back right this instant, **Hop give me that back– **_"it's not what it looks like!" He sputtered. Hop jumped out of the way as he fumbled and tripped over himself, sprawling into the dirt and grass. _"Hop!_ It's not what it–"

Why was he so_ embarrassed?_

_"You have a crush!"_ Hop screeched, shrill and excited and far too smug, "You have a crush! Lee has– _MOM!"_

_"Don't you dare!"_ Leon screamed and tore off up the hill after his brother.

There was no way. How could he– Leon wouldn't have _missed_ something like that! Not a crush, not something so all-consuming– it was impossible to just not notice something like finding someone a little too perfect, or too handsome, or too gentle with his hands and diligent in his work or so beautifully lethal and focused the way Raihan was on the pitch–

Leon focused on pumping his legs instead of screaming again. Arceus knew his throat couldn't take it.

* * *

Their mom hadn't been happy to catch them running in the house.

Leon had honestly forgotten what this specific brand of disappointment felt like. He didn't miss it. Especially not when Hop had screamed and Rotom had flipped up out of his hands, darting to the first modicum of safety in sight– their mother's open hands.

Their mother, who had been quietly sitting across from him since Hop had tiptoed to his room and left Leon to his fate. (He didn't blame him. Leon wanted to escape too.)

"I'm not mad at you, sweetheart."

Leon hung his head. His tea was pretty much cold in his hands, but he kept staring into it without drinking anyway. He wasn't exactly sure where else to put his eyes.

Rotom happily chirped where his phone swayed mid-air in front of his mother. Out of anything, it had seemed more than happy to show her Leon's entire gallery. Which was all Raihan. Was nothing sacred? Leon was going to die right then and there and hopefully Rotom hadn't turned so traitor as to not delete every photo before someone else saw it (Like Raihan , Arceus forbid–)

Warm, familiar hands gently brushed his bangs aside. Leon gulped. Against his better judgment (or maybe for it) he couldn't stop himself from looking up to meet her eyes.

She smiled so painfully gentle that his heart hurt. "You're in love, baby," She murmured, and Leon shakily exhaled. "You're in love, aren't you?"

The word weren't registering.

_She thinks I'm in love with Raihan._

They couldn't.

_I'm in love with Raihan._

All Leon managed was a single choked noise. He wasn't sure what else to do besides let her hold him, unsure how to breathe around the blinding realization that every photo, every hour together, every smile and smirk and battle together...

_Arceus, I'm in love with Raihan._

* * *

Looking at Raihan was immediately and astonishingly _painful_.

Leon knew he wasn't handling it well. His acting skills were far from amateur– a good champion was one who hid, and composed, and _contained_– but Arceus' sake, he was a hopeless case the moment he so much as made eye contact across the room!

Was he gay? Was that what was going on? Leon had never– he'd never _noticed_ anything before! How could he have made it over two decades without noticing something like being an entire homosexual? Wasn't that supposed to be something pretty obvious?

He could still remember back before he was champion. When it was mostly just him and Sonia, and that had been a right mess, watching her dance around Nessa as her Yamper did at the mention of treats. That had been obvious. That had been _easy_. Recognition came with minor hitches and a slow steady pace that only now Leon was able to realize was incredible.

Granted, Sonia was much more self-aware than Leon could ever hope to be, but she had figured this out so early. Leon was in his _twenties_. That was a lot of years to not realize he liked men.

...Not that he had had any real romantic feelings to make any guesses off of before. That definitely did not help. It was a lot easier to just assume he liked women rather than waste time wondering why no one had managed to catch his eye before.

Sonia had once. It was impossible not to when she was the sole other kid his age growing up. But that hadn't grown into anything– not when they got older, not when Leon understood what was going on, and certainly not when Sonia had panicked in the middle of the wild area over curry because she realized she liked Nessa while they were all still contestants.

(It was almost relieving, to have realized he had been far more happy for her than ever upset.)

Leon groaned to himself, scruffing his hand roughly through his hair. He couldn't keep focusing on this. Didn't he have literally _anything_ more important to do?

A heated wing gently smacked against his back. Leon barely reframed from sighing when Charizard's head lowered a little to better catch his eyes. He had several more important things to do and half of them were at his fingertips. Their dinner was going to burn. "Yeah, I'm– I'm paying attention," He murmured. The pokemon huffed at him until he continued to stir. "Go harass the noodles, already, I'm not going to ruin the sauce!"

Another huff, but Charizard eventually lumbered off and left Leon alone in the kitchen again.

Leon made it a solid two minutes before he was discreetly waving Rotom up and off the counter.

Rotom happily sped directly into his hands, Leon's photo gallery opened up without him even needing to prompt anymore. The pokemon seemed thrilled somehow, every time Leon asked to see it. As if it wasn't almost the only thing he even did with his phone, besides calling his family and texting Raihan himself. Their little "game" had really taken off with the tiny ghost.

Leon backed away from the stove and settled heavily against the counter. (He had learned his lesson after the first time he did this he sparked the stove and nearly caught his cape on fire– ditching that piece of fabric was equally gratifying and strange.) Flicking through the gallery had become almost second nature. In the beginning, it had been endless entertainment just to scroll through his hoard and giggle where no one could see him. Relishing in the tiny victories of catching Raihan off guard and getting away with it.

It was probably a little weird to be proud of something like becoming skilled at discreetly taking photos, but he couldn't deny that he was.

Every little image was a victory. Even the smudged side profiles and shots from a distance– and Leon had _lots_ of those. Most of the early gallery was all pictures taken over the top of a crowd or across the room, Raihan a fairly blurry figure towering over heads and furniture.

At least, until Leon started to get more creative. the pictures got closer, and closer– from hiding across the room to inches away, he had it all. Asleep upon Hammerlocke's rooftop, draped over Flygon, sprinting after a wayward trapinch loose from its den– Leon had steadily built a treasure trove.

...All solely built on his best friend.

(He was in love, he wouldn't be in love, he was in love– Leon had to deny it (_had to prove it)––)_

Leon's eyes caught on one of the most recent ones. Raihan sprawled over his couch, mid-stretch. Leon had taken a risk snapping that one– barely a foot away with nothing but the flimsy cover of Raihan's eyelids and yet the pay off had been worth it. It was the only one like it that Leon had managed to snag. Raihan's usual hoodie had bunched up over his chest, tugged up from over an hour of idly slipping further and further down the cushion over the course of some stupid movie before an innocent stretch had treated Leon to a hefty eyeful of his rival's abs. The curve of his pelvis, under his shorts that did very, very little to cover anything of the length of leg always easily _there_ for anyone to see.

That, coupled with how his long legs had already been– one splayed casually across Leon's lap (as if he hadn't already been panicking enough), the other hooked around his knee until that lithe ankle could brush the bare skin of Leon's own–

Rotom chirped in worry as Leon slowly slid to the ground and buried his face in his hands.

Charizard came charging back in, stepping right over Leon curled up on the tiles to manage the now very burnt sauce.

"I think I'm in love with Raihan," he squeaked out. Charizard made a noncommittal sound and Leon peeked up through his fingertips to find his partner staring at him incredulously. After a moment, she just went right back to stirring the sauce like nothing had happened. Like Leon hadn't just confessed that he was in love, that he was head over heels, that he was absolutely fucking _whipped_ for _who knew how long–_

His face felt superheated. "That's not– you're not surprised."

Charizard rolled her eyes at him. Leon wanted to die.

He didn't do more than whimper _"I'm in love with him, I'm in love with him,"_ as Charizard carefully turned off the stovetop and dragged Leon off to bed. They could eat dinner later.

* * *

It was at the prompting of his entire team that Leon gained any of the courage required to leave his apartment the next morning.

Not that he actually managed it in the end. It was only enough encouragement to uncurl out of his blankets and try to make up some degree of humanity. he took a shower, got dressed (and carefully did not look at his cape, still crumpled on the floor of his bedroom– Gloria hadn't wanted it. He wasn't upset about that, but... Leon was only now realizing that he didn't want it either and now had nowhere to put the damn thing–) and sat at his kitchen counter blankly.

Charizard had simply rolled her eyes and moved away, probably to return to her pokeball. Leon envied her maybe just a little. He'd give anything to just curl up into a comfortable little ball right then. Rotom chirping at his elbow just made him want to go back to bed even more. Or put his head back into his hands. Or maybe cry, crying sounded nice–

Someone was at the door. Knocking. On his door.

Leon jerked to his feet, freezing mid-motion. He wasn't expecting anyone. It wouldn't be the first time that a fan had sussed Leon's address out of somewhere, be it through following Hop or outright stalking him, but to knock in broad daylight was a new height of– Charizard poked her snout back into the kitchen and Leon jumped back into motion. "Standby," He hissed, eyes wide, "I don't know who– hey?!" The ex-champion gaped as his partner snorted a plume of smoke his way and stomped towards the door. "W-wait!"

He made it to the entryway just as Charizard nudged the door open, nearly smacking Raihan in the process.

The one or two current brain cells still working in Leon's head abruptly stopped, waved goodbye, and walked into the ocean.

"H-he- Woah," Raihan sputtered, stumbling back a little as Charizard pushed her muzzle into his chest. Leon swallowed as bright blue eyes locked onto him. He felt way too exposed for someone fully dressed in their own apartment. "Mate, why is..." Leon watched him reach up, hesitantly patting the side of Charizard's neck. When she didn't do more than croon contently into his hoodie he slowly began to rub at the sweet spot at the base of her nape. "She's not usually so clingy. Treat her heavy tonight, didja?"

Leon flushed. He didn't think it was possible to keep blushing so much and yet here he was, breaking the laws of physics in the face of his crush. Charizard had never been too happy about Raihan. Somehow having both a best human and pokemon friend meant a decade of unnecessary rivalry that had never let up until now. it was almost as if watching Leon reduce himself to a puddle over a handful of photos switched something in her brain.

He hadn't answered yet. Even Charizard was starting to stare him down expectantly. "A-ah, yeah, mate, she's– uh–" Arceus, what was he even supposed to say? He hadn't exactly had time to prepare for– "Haha, uh, Raihan, what... are you doing here...!" _Perfect! Absolutely spotless– Oh, Charizard is glaring at me now._

Raihan smiled at him and Leon did his best not to do something stupid like melt. Maybe it wasn't too late to ask Charizard to set him on fire. She loved setting things on fire. "What, can't I come say hi to my esteemed rival? I'm hurt, Leon, I thought you loved me."

_Yes, that's kind of the issue here...!_

If neither of them did something immediately Leon was going to do something impulse and ridiculous like confess his feelings on the spot. What would be left then but to immediately drown? Leon had never– Raihan had never been so quiet, not with him, what if he had done something wrong–

There was a tiny tint to Raihan's cheeks. Leon carefully did not act on the urge to slap himself at the sight of it. "Yeah, I... Hey, do you wanna come and get a drink with me?" His eyes averted, just a little. Just to Leon's left. Not quite meeting his eyes and yet the longer Leon thought on it the more he swore he was just projecting. "You've been kind of cooped up here, mate. Don't want Galar's dear idol to mold in place."

Leon blinked. "Are you asking me–" _No, of course he isn't, Raihan isn't–_ "Yeah! Of course, what kind of rival would I be, if I didn't..." do _what_, exactly, Leon had no idea.

What mattered was that Raihan was still here, standing half in his doorway with Leon's traitor of a partner draped over him and craning her head his way in a manner that made Leon want to flee because _Arceus' sake_ Raihan was going to _see_ her that was _not subtle–_ _"Let's go!"_ Leon blurted out and bustled Raihan backward out the door before the other could do something like make sense of Charizard's terrible idea of discretion.

"Alright, alright, hold up–!" Raihan cackled as he leaned back enough to almost force them both to the floor. "Mate, I can _walk_ you know!" He proceeded to demonstrate just that with a purposeful step forward and out of Leon's reach.

Was Leon about to let that stand? When Charizard was still just several feet away and watching them from the door?

Call him gay and a fool but Leon was not about to take unnecessary risks.

This translated into taking the unnecessary risk of lunging and scooping Raihan right off the ground.

"Le-EON!" Raihan squawked. His arms instinctively locked around Leon, fingers catching on the tangles left in Leon's hair. "Leon! What are you _doing_, you daft–" Leon's hand caught on a flailing thigh and his mind went terribly blank as his fingers instinctively wrapped around lean muscle. Raihan's startled noise at the touch of it, eyes widening as a misjudged kick made Leon's grip slip was almost, almost enough to make Leon drop him. _"Leon!"_

"Let's go out!" Leon hopefully did not screech as loud as he was sure he did, and then just as hopefully worked on not dropping back onto the floor and hiding his face as his own words registered. _"D-drinking!_ Let's go out and get a bevvie and do _absolutely nothing else!"_

Maybe he could get enough alcohol in him as needed to stop feeling like his heart was about to explode.

Or enough to confess.

Raihan shrieked when Leon idly adjusted him in his arms, making the ex-champion far too aware of his hands slipping over smooth, heated skin– fingertips unconsciously tightening in the natural dips and hollows of lithe musculature and the firm curve of Raihan's chest–

There was a thin balance between too little and too much alcohol and Leon was about to test it to the fullest.

* * *

this was torture. Leon was being tortured. He was in endless pain and it was entirely his own fault.

Was Raihan always this dense or was it Leon. Who was the owner of this award?

"Do you want to go out with me?"

"Yeah aight, I'm starving. Whatcha got in mind?"

"No, I'm saying I like you."

"I know, mate, I've already said I like you too! Are you only just realizing we're friends or something? What has this past decade been if you haven't been returning my affections?"

"Raihan, I love you."

"You're so much more openly affectionate now that Rose isn't breathing down your neck! It's a good look mate, love you too."

...Leon was starting to wonder if Raihan would just flat out thank him if he gave him an Applin.

He genuinely had no idea where to go from there. Leon was on a street surrounded by stop signs in all directions and they were in Raihan's signature colors. What was left? Snogging him? Leon couldn't even _reach_ Raihan's face to kiss him, much less gain the courage to _ask_.

So no asking Raihan. Absolutely not. The thought of it alone was making Leon's palms sweaty. Charizard was already glaring at him.

Leon groaned loudly and rolled right off the side of his bed.

Rotom chirped in alarm, peeking over the side from where it had been hovering idly over his face for the past hour. "Leon?" It twittered nervously. The gallery of Raihan (lovingly dubbed the Crime Scene by Gloria and Victor after an unfortunate visit home) blinked away for Rotom's face to instead peer down at him through the screen. "Are you alright? You fell!"

He very decidedly did not want to get up. "What am I supposed to _do_, Rotom?" He asked mournfully. "Raihan is so... I would never say it to his face but he's so _dumb_. How could he really not catch on? It's been weeks!" Somewhere outside his bedroom, he could faintly hear Charizard snort. _"Weeks,_ Rotom," He moaned louder.

"My apologies Leon, I don't know."

Of course he wouldn't. Leon didn't really expect a pokemon to understand or care much about the nuances of human romance. Or how badly they failed at it. (Regardless of how many times Charizard rolled her eyes at him.)

Asking Sonia didn't earn him much more than a flustered hour of stuttering and a very cheeky text from Nessa wishing him the most sarcastic good luck he had ever seen. Leon was not about to stoop to ask Hop or their neighbors– literal _children_– for advice they didn't have, and just meeting his mother's eyes after that night in the kitchen made him want to take a nap–

Leon bolted upright, almost smacking face-first into his phone. "Rotom," He started hesitantly, "Could you– do me a favor?"

No one he knew _personally_ could give him much in the way of helpful, real advice. He had tried that and exhausted the options deemed Possibly Useful. (As in they laughed at him. Most of them. Near all of them. Even Hop was laughing at him. Leon was going to get so much revenge the moment his brother was old enough to start a relationship.) But Leon knew there was a plethora of untapped resources if he just _asked_.

He was going to break his own rules.

"Caption it this…"

* * *

The public response was immediate and overwhelming.

Rotom was practically spinning itself in circles with every new round of comments. Leon was getting dizzy just watching it. His Pigeotter alone had exploded. He didn't even want to check Pokegram– it was likely all the same. Which was both flattering, startling, and _frustrating_ all at once because not _one_ person in the flood of commenters had_ actually answered his questions._

**A Champion Time Izzyhere Feb 6**

Is this real? Someone confirm if this is real

**Dragon Tame Me Reallynowraihan Feb 6**

real convincing if it isnt real have you seen the other posts

**ITS HAPPENING realestfangirl217 Feb 6**

ITS REAL MY SHIP I N

**Slippery NessaOfficial Feb 6**

Leon answer ur damn phone Sonia has been calling u for hours

**Punk Pansexual LetsMakeSomeNoise**

Fucking finally.

Leon slapped a hand over his face. The notifications were still pouring in. It had been hours since he let Rotom start posting. Maybe it had been a mistake to fire his PR team. Was this what they fielded every day?! He wasn't even in these photos. Leon knew Raihan had a stronger online presence than any of the own Gym Leaders in Galar, but the reactions to Leon's gallery were...

He was also more than a little worried about Rotom's choice in photos. The unnecessarily gooey look on the Dragon trainer's face when dealing with a baby silicobras covering them both in sand should not be as embarrassing to have public as it was. Nor the look Raihan gave him, head thrown back mid-laugh in Leon's apartment. The glow of the TV on his eyes and lips– hell, the mussed half-asleep arch of his back mid-stretch– Leon was not , in fact, ridiculous in his own embarrassment, thank you very much Charizard. (At least they weren't the ones when he was asleep– no one needed to know that Leon was sneaking shots of his best friend when he was unconscious.)

His phone rang. Sonia, again. Seventeen missed calls. The first two he answered had just been yelling. Leon wasn't even sure what she was yelling about, but it was clear after she hung up and called back the first time that it wasn't something dangerous. Didn't she have Nessa for that? Leon had his own crisis to handle, thank you very much.

Rotom happily floated away when Leon curled up on the floor, knowing by now that the ex-champion would not move for a while.

* * *

A week had passed, and Raihan was acting weird.

Leon hadn't noticed at first but in retrospect he could tell it started barely a day after he had begun to let Rotom post. Or well... maybe it hadn't. Arceus knew Leon was very adept at projecting. Maybe he was just seeing his own nerves reflect off Raihan.

Why else would his rival look so confused and anxious? Leon hadn't heard Raihan stutter since they were both still challengers in the tournament and now he was doing it every time Leon greeted him. Every touch was almost shakily hesitant in a way it hadn't been for years. It was almost as if he was relearning how to be around Leon.

He was probably just confused by Leon's own blundering awkwardness. A decade of playing up an image for the camera yet now Leon couldn't keep it together in front of his crush and it showed.

Yeah, that was probably it.

(Leon would have loved to look a little closer. An all-consuming crush didn't suddenly mean he wasn't concerned about a rapid change in Raihan's behavior– but frankly, it was next to impossible just to meet the other's eyes since Hop had given him a wake-up call. How was he supposed to look at Raihan and not be painfully aware that he had been in love for the better half of a decade? Leon was not the champion of coping.)

Even worse, his queue of the Crime Scene was running out. Leon had no idea he even could run out, yet lo and behold Rotom had woken him with a depressed flurry of chirps. The tiny ghost had been an all too happy accomplice. Several pictures a day, and now they were running thin– and Leon still had maybe the bare bones of something resembling an answer. He couldn't even bring himself to take any more pictures. Hadn't been able to, actually, since he started posting what he had in the first place. It was hard enough just hanging out with Raihan without feeling like his ribs were closing in on his heart.

Desperation wasn't cute but Arceus, Leon was only human. Confessing to Raihan had become a daily endeavor with no success. Leon had never lost so much in his life.

It was even worse now because somehow over the week Raihan's responses had gone from joking affection to complete dismissal. Before, Leon at least could tell Raihan he loved him and Raihan would happily say it back. It was blatantly platonic, but at least he had that. Now, when Leon said it, Raihan would make this high pitched noise and just sort of... wave his hands at him. Or do anything other than saying it back, his face red like he was trying to hold back a coughing fit.

Leon looked up and– _Arceus, fuck, he's doing it right now._

They were just out in Postwick; doing little more than laying on the grass and watching their teams wander around and play. Leon hadn't even been doing anything, hadn't even looked at Raihan and yet the dragon trainer was pulling that face. The pursed lips, tight jaw, furrowed brow– and Leon wasn't even sure what he did this time to cause it.

"Hey, Leon?" Raihan winced as his voice cracked on Leon's name. He sat up, shrouding Leon in cool shade.

Abruptly, Leon felt he needed to pay attention.

Raihan's eyes were utterly fixed on his. As if looking away meant shattering something fragile.

Leon sat up and nearly broke the moment anyway, only just refraining from jerking back as he realized Raihan hadn't bothered to move away for Leon to properly get up– had barely even breathed with Leon a scant few centimeters from his face.

(His chest hurt. He couldn't breathe. How had Leon managed to miss _this_, all these years?)

Raihan opened his mouth, said some words. Leon managed to hear exactly none of them. It was a little hard to focus. How was he supposed to just sit there and process sounds when Raihan's face was so near, when his lips shaped those words so closely that Leon swore he would feel them on his own if he just shut his eyes?

Something warm and smooth nudged into his hands, limp in his lap.

Leon looked down at the shiny green Applin.

"...and maybe make your account private," Raihan's voice came flooding back to Leon's ears, rasping and thick with embarrassment and something so _familiar_ – "Do you know how much Nessa and Piers have been laughing at me? I can't take any more of this, how did you even get some of those pho–"

"This is an Applin," Leon gasped.

Raihan paused.

Leon had no idea what to do with his hands. Or the rest of him. Was he shaking? "You gave me an Applin."

"I– did you seriously hear nothing of what I just said?" Leon looked up. Meeting his best friend's eyes were suddenly easier than it had ever been and yet the hardest thing he had ever done– everything looked so wavery, somehow, as if he was blinking through water. "Leon, I've been in love with you for nearly a decade, I– _Arceus,_ why are you _crying?!"_

"N-No!" Yes he was. "I'm– I–" Definitely crying. A lot. So much that he couldn't stop if he tried. vaguely, Leon could hear Charizard landing somewhere to his left, crooning lowly.

Raihan's eyes seemed to glow, in his face. Wide and bright and utterly fixated on Leon, as if it would be painful to look away. His hands slid up Leon's forearms. They were so warm. Calloused and rough and easily Leon's favorite things to touch– "Can I kiss you?" –They shook, warm and perfect and blessedly heated on Leon's cool skin.

Leon was properly sure he wouldn't be able to speak if he tried. Hopefully, just nodding was enough. Hopefully, Raihan would see he was smiling if it was visible behind Leon's hands while he frantically tried to wipe away tears. How could he be crying _now_, of all times?

Those long fingers gently tugged Leon's hands down and away. He grasped at them desperately as soft, slightly chapped lips pressed to his. A breath and they were gone, and back again, and again, and again– "I-I'm sorry about the– the pictures," Leon sobbed. "I wasn't– I didn't know what else to..."

Another kiss, butterflying over his jaw, over the bridge of his nose, the arch of his cheek, "I'm so glad you did," Raihan murmured, almost to himself, "I'm so glad you told me."

Leon didn't– hadnt. Haven't managed to confess, haven't managed to say a word– not ones that Raihan had believed. He hadn't succeeded at _all–!_

Raihan wouldn't stop kissing him. Leon couldn't be more grateful for that, at the moment. If Charizard had already left, he didn't hear it. "I'm sorry it took me so long to pay attention."

Leon's chest shuddered on his inhale. How did the former Champion of Galar turn out to be such a mess?

Another kiss, light and gentle to the corner of his mouth. The Applin wiggled its way out of Leon's lap.

Leon pushed Raihan down and finally confessed properly.

* * *

Epilogue: leon's social media is now shared with raihan. Hop is just happy to be rid of the mess

Things not mentioned: Raihan bred that applin himself. also leon is a dumb big Himbo idiot who doesnt realize/notice that half the commenters on his IG and twitter are Tagging Raihan Over His Feed.

Title taken from Two Slow Dancers by Mitski!

may possibly sometime do an equal bit which is just Raihan's POV of this, because the sheer panic and confusion of that makes me Yell

Find me over at my tumblr, Leviathiane!


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